Thursday, January 27, 2011

Why I'm Rooting for the Packers

Do I give a rat's ass about the Green Bay Packers or the Pittsburgh Steelers? No. Nor should you. The 2011 playoffs became officially un-bro after the Pats lost (reason: Tom Brady's chill flow), and Rothlisberger tried out the whole rapist thing.

But why should you root for the Packers in two weeks at the next Superbowl? Because Aaron Rodgers is a bro. He managed to photobomb every Packers team captain picture since he's been on the team. Of course.. he's actually a captain now, but this is quite the streak for a then-new Cal quarterback.

Well done, Aaron. Also he's from Chico, California, and that's chill.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Weekly Bro-Port

Alright maybe not weekly. Your concern has been noted and I don't care.

Brodeo (n.): A get-together or bacchanalia (might need to google that one, too) in which the attendance is predominantly or entirely male.

"Bro, way too many dicks on the dance floor out there, this party blows.

What bro, is this your first brodeo?"

And your official bro-quote of the week (month):

"The broportant thing is to not stop questioning."
-Albert Einstein, Brosquire

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Total bro shot. And then he isn't even really surprised, no big deal. His teammate on the bench is more excited about it.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

A Lesson in Automobiles

This is from where a woman posted details about her boyfriend's Jeep troubles. Luckily they were happy to help.
Registered User
'96 Jeep Cherokee: Need Opinions

So, my boyfriend bought a '96 Cherokee (XJ) SE, for way too much, like around $3,000. It broke down and he has put another $2,500 in it and totally rebuilt the engine and did a lot of after market work on it. He has and will do all the labor himself, he refuses to pay for labor. Now, he finds out that the motor needs to be taken back out and fixed again and is looking at another $700. I said he should just sell it and wipe his hands clean, he says he won't make enough.

Firstly, what is your guys' opinion on what he should do? Secondly, how much do you think he could make parting it versus just the whole car as is?

Thanks for your guys' opinions!

Luckily wgirvine, honorary bro and jeep enthusiast, comes up big time.

I feel the need...
'96 Jeep Cherokee: Need Opinions

You want my opinion? Ok…

Shut the hell up. You’re not his wife. You’re not paying for the repairs. It’s absolutely none of your business what he does with his Jeep or his money. I know your type well… first it’s “Sell the Jeep because it’s costing too much money.” Then it’s “No, you can’t go spend the weekend with your buddies because I need you to take me shopping.” Then it’s “Oh gee, honey… I’m pregnant. Gosh, I have no idea how that happened.”

You’re a DreamKiller. You kill a guy’s dreams, take away his future, tie him down with a fat mortgage and too many babies, and turn him into just another miserable guy wondering, “How the hell did I get here?”

Do you really want to help him? Here’s what you do… go to your local library (it’s a big building with books inside) and check out a couple of books on rebuilding engines. Read them, over and over, until YOU understand what needs to be done. Then help him get that engine out and rebuild it. Tie your hair back in a ponytail, put on some old jeans and get your hands dirty. Hand him wrenches, hold the light, pull the wire connectors apart, help him get the hood off… help him with anything he needs. When he gets tired, run inside and make him a hot lunch or dinner. Fix him coffee, hot chocolate, whatever he wants. (But NO beer. Beer is for when the job is done.)

Then when the day is over and you’re both exhausted from working on the engine, push him into a hot shower and jump in with him. Scrub his back, wash his hair, rinse him off, and dry him with fluffy towels still hot from the dryer. Then push him into bed and screw his ears off. Then get up the next day and do it all over again.

Make him realize that rebuilding an engine is a slow and methodical process. Make him realize that every step should be regarded as surgery; every step must be perfect… perfect torque, perfect fit, perfectly clean. If you run into a step that you just can’t figure out, ask for help from someone who knows what he’s doing. Are you cute? Put on a low-cut top, show some cleavage and go (by yourself) to the local Jeep shop, and explain to the guys that you are helping your boyfriend to rebuild his engine and neither of you can figure out this one little step, and do they have any advice…

Think it won’t work? Think again. We guys love to help cute girls, even if they have a boyfriend. (Hey, maybe you’ve got a sister, or girlfriend…)

But absolutely DO NOT whine or complain. Do not say a single negative thing. Not a single “Oooooo, I broke a nail.” If you break a nail, or cut your finger, or bang a knuckle, you just shut up and DEAL WITH IT. You should be a hopelessly optomistic, never-say-die cheerleader, encouraging him every step of the way.

That’s my opinion.
Link to the article:

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

The Final Frontier

This is an unofficial NASA commercial and it kicks ass. Watch it in HD.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Louis C.K

This has been a pretty popular video for a long time, I probably saw it for the first time a year ago, but now that I've seen a follow-up it reignited my interest in it.

Louis C.K is a comedian (and has a mediocre TV show called Louie or something, it was meh), and was on Conan O'Brien some time ago doing an interview. A short while in he brought up a small piece of his bit and I feel that it had a deeper meaning then when I first saw it, and now as times have changed for everyone.

Over 2 million people agreed with me and have seen it, (insert stupid Youtube comment about how 72 people need their back hair waxed). I bring this up again, however, because of the TIME magazine interview I stumbled upon (no, not on

A much more down to earth Louis, though not quite as much as his television show, which let me reiterate is not good.

Call me a YouTube-whore or whatever, but Louis C.K is a bro and deserves his spot

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

...And it Was a Beautiful Day Indeed

Break was excellent. That's why there's nothing new here.

In other news, this guy is ready to lead you to new horizons and new ventures in the great outdoors. How neat is that?

It's even shot in HD so you can capture every single neat aspect of neature. You can tell this is an Aspen tree because of the way it is. Wow. Neat.

Look for a Bro-Port coming shortly.